


Blue Fire

by Hanzel_Watson



Category: Hemlock Grove, IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Asexuality, Bisexuality, Cute, Derry, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, F/M, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pennywise (IT) Being an Asshole, Protective Pennywise, Scars, Slow Build, Smoking, Teenage Dorks, Teenage Drama, Teenage Rebellion, Turtles, Underage Smoking, bully pennywise, pennywise is roman godfrey, young pennywise
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-07-10 15:50:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19908253
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hanzel_Watson/pseuds/Hanzel_Watson
Summary: Lilly Hemingway has been through a lot. It's more than enough to say that she's had her fair share of trauma and loss. But nothing could prepare her for moving to the south side of Derry and meeting a villainous Pennywise, Penn as he's known to his friends, that cares for nothing more than to make her life hell. Or does he?





	1. Alive

Lilly

A gentle orange. That’s the first thing I noticed. It glowed vibrantly, disrupting the surrounding black that went on and on and on. I saw red… and yellow within the orange. The colours lived and breathed for a moment, then disappeared, then reappeared all over again. I needed to take a closer look… The flame grew larger as I approached it, pulling me in, deeper and deeper. It was such a beautiful thing. So strong; so _alive_. I reached my hand out through the darkness, steady and yearning.

Just as my hand felt the trickles of warmth from the light of the flame, a terrible, painful sound pierced through the black. I needed to see, I needed to _feel_ , that deep golden light, but that scream rose louder and louder. It seemed to come from within the dark itself, not from any single particle or place; it came from everywhere. The flame was starting to recede. The exquisitely painted reds, yellows, and greens were already fading away, disappearing. I extended my arm, reaching, grasping for it one last time…


	2. Running

Penn

Fuck. FUCK. I stumbled through the underbrush, drunk with rage, fear, whatever. I just needed to get away. It had been only a blur - but that was okay. I didn’t need to remember. It had been a long time since I had felt the Urge. It was steaming through me now, pulsing through my muscles and joints with every heartbeat. I could feel the cold of the November night prickling at my hot cheeks, the sweat clinging to the nape of my neck, my mouth dry but still tasting the unmistakable bitter-metallic taste of blood.

None of these senses mattered. I just needed to get the fuck away. What had I done? The fuck had I done?! Dad was right, he was always right… but that hurt too much to think about. I focused on moving my legs faster as I ran through the shrubbery of the Barrens. Why the fuck are they called the Barrens? Some shit misnomer.

I saw blue lights to my left and veered the other way. The wind was worse in this direction, making me gasp and cough as the cold air filled my lungs. Shit. I remembered barely anything of what had happened. There had been the argument - thinking of earlier today brought another punch of pain to my stomach, and a fresh burst of the Urge. No. NO. Control. That’s what Dad always said, wasn't it? The hell he did. Fuck him! I laughed as I moved through the never ending shrubbery. Wet leaves and sharp branches still hit my face as my hands wildly cleared a path for my body.

Sirens in the distance. I giggled hysterically as I thought of what a surprise they must have found. Who am I to say? It’d be a surprise for me too! But I need to focus. All things are better with focus. In the distance, the sun began its daily rise over the dark Barrens. I could see its light being reflected in the boiling water to my right, shining yellow, red, and so much orange directly into my eyes. Fiery orange. The giggles never stopped as I ran farther and farther away...


	3. Encounter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An accidental encounter is nothing but shocking.

“Lilly, do you have a sec? We need to talk.” 

Lilly put down her book, a little novella called  _ Heart of Darkness  _ that she had picked up at the library _ ,  _ and looked up at her mother standing in the doorway to her room. Her eyes looked guilty, and Lilly noticed the wrinkles that scarred her once beautiful face had grown deeper. 

“Sure, mom. What’s going on?”

Natalie Hemingway hesitated before her daughter, then sighed and joined her sitting up on the bed. She glanced at Lilly’s face once and looked down at her palms. Slowly, she began speaking.

“Look, honey. Do you remember that time, when we all went to the zoo?” Lilly nodded. Her mother continued, “Oh, you were so little. And you were looking around at all the animals, your face was all sticky and covered from cotton candy,” She managed a smile at the memory, but Lilly was still wary of her mother’s mood. 

Back when her father was still alive, when they were still a family, her life was so much more fulfilled. They had lived in a grand house on Centre Street, homely but impressive. She loved that house. Maybe because it was her home before everything went wrong.

They had been at the zoo. She was probably around twelve and reaching that age where most kids stuff was a little too "kid". No more Halloween, no more eating a jar of cookies at 3 am. But they still went to the zoo. She and her mom and her dad. Jackie was already gone, but she could forget about him when they went to the zoo.

There were lions and tigers and penguins. She especially liked the great big buffalo with their magnificent chocolate hair and wise eyes.

"There had been a wounded buffalo near the gate," her mother said, as if reading Lilly's thoughts, "a caretaker was there, treating his scars with ointment. Without warning you went up to him and asked, 'Mister, what are you doing?' in your sweet voice. He told you he was helping the buffalo become big and strong, remember?" Lilly nodded again.   


"And then you told him, told him you were gonna sign up with the zoo and work with the buffalo and help dad pay the bills." Natalie sniffled at the mention of her late husband.    


"But then you said I was too young for a job. That I'd never need a job to help with the bills as long as you and Dad loved me."   


Natalie finally collected herself enough to look at her daughter. Her face was grim, not at all like the memory they had just revisited.    


"We're behind on electricity and water. I know… I know moving here was supposed to be a solution so that you can focus on your studies and your skating. But it's not enough, Lilly. I'm so sorry. I'm so-"   


"Mom, mom it's okay. I understand. Don't worry about it. School doesn't start for another week. I'll find something. I'm trying to take less courses in my junior year anyway. We'll be alright."   


Lilly looked earnestly, reassuring her mother.  _ It's gonna be okay _ . She tried to think that thought so hard, maybe hard enough for it to become true. her mother was already working overtime at the diner. It was only right for her to help out.   


_ As long as we love you _ . They were in deep shit.

________

The candy store was useless. Lilly almost smelled the rejection as she walked through the door and the bell above her made that pleasant ringing noise.   


"Sorry, summer's over kid. No need for another one," the man behind the counter growled, eyeing her up and down. She was dressed in her best blouse, a light blue, and skinny jeans. Still, that did not hide the toll that her wardrobe had taken after the move. The new house just didn't have the space for her lavish coats and jackets and luxurious dresses, and they definitely couldn't afford to replace the clothes she already wore. The blouse was tattered around the shoulders and the jeans patched in a few spots by the ankles. Not the best first impression. But maybe they really didn't need more people.   


The way he looked at her said otherwise. Like scum.

Lilly gave him a smile, gave her thanks, and continued on.    


So, that checked off the candy store, an antiques store, and the restaurant. Guess summer really was the busiest season. She walked along Up Mile Hill, looking for openings or signs. None.   


The air was nice and cool on her face as she walked. It really was a pleasant day; the heat wasn't too intense, unlike the rest of the summer.  _ Too bad I didn't take a jacket with me _ , she thought as little goosebumps appeared on her arms when the wind blew.    


Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the drugstore on the intersection of Up Mile Hill and Centre Street. She really wouldn't have paid much attention to this, but something in the window caught her eye. Something like a flame hovering over the counter. A feeling deep in her subconscious stirred; perhaps she was almost remembering the intense vision she had dreamt last night-   


Then she took a closer look and that feeling was gone. The flame turned into bright ginger hair. She knew exactly who was standing at the counter. Her heart leapt excitedly and she walked into the drugstore.   


"Bev!"   


The tall beautiful girl looked up from the catalogues she had been sorting. A smile spread across her pleasantly freckled face.    


"Lilly, hey! How long's it been? I haven't seen you in  _ ages _ !"    


Lilly beamed back at her friend. Their mothers worked at the diner together, and used to have regular “tea parties” with the two girls when they had been younger and more willing to wear frizzy princess dresses. Lilly never met Bev's father and her friend rarely talked about him, but she never gave it too much thought. She never gave the sunglasses that Beverly insisted she wear indoors any thought either. But they were good friends.   


"Yeah, I've missed you so much. Let's have another tea party," Lilly replied. The two broke out into a fit of giggles and reached over the counter for a slightly uncomfortable hug. Bev smelled like peaches, as always.    


"So… what's brought you into my lair of drugs and commodities?" Bev's eyes shined with humor. 

“Hmm well I’d like some good, high-quality mari-ju-hana if you happen to have some,” Lilly kept the joke up and was about to continue when the door behind the counter opened and an important looking young man stepped through. He glanced at Lilly nonchalantly. He didn’t find her joke funny.  _ Oops. Definitely won’t get a job here. Didn’t even try.  _ Bev noticed him and snickered.    


“Oh Ben, when will you stop being so serious?”    


His face softened looking at her. Lilly could see the hints of a blush creeping up onto his cheeks. Otherwise, his face was plenty attractive, stubble covering his rough chin and eyebrows that moved with his eyes to give the appearance of being intently focused on everything that happens around him. Bev pretended not to notice his blush, or really didn’t notice it; she seemed comfortable with Ben. And guys generally had similar reactions around her. Ben, on the other hand, shifted on his feet and cleared his throat, looking back at Lilly. This time, the joke had been all but forgotten.    


“Do you two know each other?” He inquired.  Lilly considered him. He seemed all right.   


“Our moms know each other. We’re long lost childhood friends,” She glanced at Beverly and saw her grinning, “and the name’s Lilly. You’re Ben?”   


“Hanscom. Pleased to meet you.” He extended his hand and Lilly shook it. He spoke with a conceived air of authority and she could tell he was acting for Bev’s sake.    


“Ben Hanscom? Oh, I remember, I think we might have gone to daycare together. Sorry I didn’t recognize you, you were...” She trailed off. He looked at her understandingly.   


“Fat.”   


Now Lilly was the one feeling hot blush. Bev was trying hard not to snicker by distracting herself with those catalogues. Ben really had lost weight, probably half of his body. He had been a pudgy kid. Standing in front of her though was a six foot tall athlete whose muscles showed faintly through his plain grey T.   


Her thoughts were interrupted by Bev asking, “So, what’re you doing here Lill? There’s no bargain to be found at the Derry Center Street Drugstore, trust me, I’ve looked.”   


“Oh, sorry, yeah, I was just in the area and saw you… just came in to say hello.” She told them about her unfortunate luck finding a job. Bev perked up at this.   


“Why don’t you come work here? It’d be great, I could take some shifts off and focus on school instead,” Ben looked around frantically before composing himself. “What do you think?”

A wave of astonishment washed over Lilly. Maybe this could work out. The store wasn’t too far from the Derry High School, so that would be convenient. She nodded confidently at her friend, who then turned to Ben. He looked uncomfortable with her gaze so intense upon him, but also loving every second beside her.    


“I don’t know… I’d have to train her...” He scratched the back of his head. Bev urged him on.    


“Come on! You know we’ll need an extra pair of hands around here once school starts. You don’t want to fail your courses, do you?” She stepped toward him, putting her hand on his toned arm and violating his personal space, the poor guy’s only defense against her charms. Lilly almost rolled her eyes at the couple.  _ Bev really knows how to get under someone’s skin, in a good way.  _   


After looking as if he was considering the situation very seriously for several moments, but really stunned by his cashier’s intimidating presence, Ben relented.    


“Fine. I’ll set up an interview. But as you’re really our only candidate, because we weren’t planning on hiring anyone,” at this he glared at Beverly, but she only smiled sweetly, destroying the last of his resolve, “you’re basically guaranteed the job. I’ll go over training and your duties once it’s official.” And with the final word being his, he stomped back through the way he came.   


“ _ That  _ was easy,” Beverly squealed. Lilly breathed an enormous sigh of relief, realizing her heart had increased its pace inside her chest. She beamed at her old, but in a way new, friend. She thanked her wholeheartedly.  _ This will make mother happy.  _ She thought that thought over and over again, relishing in her feeling of fulfillment.    


The girls talked for a little while more. Beverly going over the ins and outs of her job even though she had just started a week or two ago, Lilly catching her up on the recent move and her new house, affirming just how great things were without realizing it. She thought Beverly could tell she was exaggerating, but left it alone. This went on until an impatient customer demanded Beverly’s attention.   


“I better get going Bev, the sun’s going down soon anyway. I’ll see you here later, or maybe at school.”    


“Yeah, good seeing you again Lilly.” They parted with a wave, Lilly looking back at Beverly with immense gratefulness.   


___________

Walking along Kansas Street back home, whistling to herself, Lilly thought of all the friends she had lost during the “Hard Time”, as her mom called it. There was Bev, whom she hoped would remain her friend once school started. Bev is certainly more extrovert than introvert, but that’s one of the reasons Lilly liked her. Beverly Marsh could, at times, be as brutally honest as her hair was red. And people seemed to get pulled towards her, as if she were a magnet; they were pulled not even as a symptom of her looks. She just had a powerful energy. Ben seemed like a good guy. _ He’d be good for her _ . Lilly hoped she would be friends with them in school.    


There was also Sally Mueller, the blond haired princess. They had sat together in English and got quite close. But, one day, it -  _ changed.  _ Did it have something to do with Bill? Bill Den-something. Lilly couldn’t quite remember his last name, yet the image that came to her mind was clear as day, which was that of a lanky boy in flannel with hair only slightly darker than Bev’s. He hung out with a Jewish kid she didn’t know, and Richie. Richie was pretty darn funny, though no one would ever admit it to his face, lest they risked encouraging him. Lilly smiled at the memory of her middle years, before the “Hard Time” started. Back then, she might even have been just as outgoing as Beverly.  _ Too bad.  _   


She thought these things - recounting memories - and not quite rushing to get home, even though the sun was getting dangerously low. Its light was now partially blocked by the Barrens in the west, giving the street a blended look with all of the colours of dusk mixed together. It was a strange scene. In the distance, trains rumbled north or south or wherever they were headed. The sounds of workers in the train yard finishing the day’s labour could just reach the girl’s ears as she walked towards the dusty, dirty neighbourhood that was now her home.    


She was close enough to the yards now to make out the grey figures of the workers, maybe 100 yards or so away. She wondered if they were gray from the coal and ash they were digging up or the strange twilight atmosphere cast on the street.   


As Lilly was about to turn right onto Old Lyme Street, a glimmer of light caught her eye. At first, she couldn’t make out where it was coming from; the little light danced around beside one of the railroads. Then the steel shovel that had been reflecting the last of the sun’s rays was turned at an angle and she could see.    


The boy wielding the shovel was just as gray as the rest of the workers, with the exception of his bright, flaming hair, greased back in a hazy mess above his head. Lilly had never seen hair so striking. She was sure that what she was seeing wasn’t even a colour that a human could completely register. No thought inside her head could understand or describe how or why it looked like those orange locks were…  _ made of flames _ ? She stood amazed, uncomprehending.   


Then the boy stopped his work and looked up at Lilly. Her breath hitched in her throat. His gaze froze her on the sidewalk, not letting her move. He was expressionless, emotionless, but his eyes never left hers. She could feel her entire body warming up, adrenaline pulsing through her veins. There was something dangerous in the air. As though the air possessed a build up of charge and was ready to strike lightning at any moment.

Even so, she could admire the delicate painting of his body. Hardened muscles shifted smoothly under the dirty armless shirt that stuck to his chest, soaked with sweat. There were tatters on his jeans and he wasn’t wearing shoes, though the train yard was covered in jagged pieces of coal. She suddenly imagined touching the skin under that shirt. She wondered how warm he would feel and what it would be like to have his rough, blistered arms wrap around her...   


Nothing could have prepared her for what came next.    


As she stared, paralyzed, his lips parted and a dark liquid began drooling out of the corner of his dark mouth.  _ Blood. _   


Fear spiked through her body. And then it must have been her imagination but she thought those same lips curved up into a smile. If her feet were not stuck in place, she would have ran. Yet she couldn’t focus enough on that.   


Instead, she heard her voice stutter (much like Bill Denbrough’s), “A-a-are you o-okay?”    


It was just a murmur of a question, not much louder than a whisper. But the boy with the flaming hair and the bleeding mouth stopped smiling… and hesitated. Lilly could feel him falter, much as she could feel the electricity around them. They were alone, together, and for that one split second she thought he was about to step towards her-   


The moment passed. Blinking, dazed, Lilly looked for the boy. But he was gone. All that was left was the glimmer of a shovel lying in the rubble and the sounds of trains in the distance.

  
  
  
  
  



	4. Fatigue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Penn comes home after a truly shitty day.

Penn

His tread back home was silent except for the low crunch of the gravel beneath his work boots. The night had already fallen by the time he finished at the yard. Pennywise was absolutely _fucking_ exhausted.

His arm still hurt from where that dickhead Jared Huggins had hit him. He looked over his shoulder and saw the reddish bruise starting to form. That would be a pain tomorrow morning.

"Hey, Mr. Sociopath had come to join us," he had jeered as Penn entered the common room for break. It really wasn't very much of a room; just three walls containing a rotten couch, a small table with a coffee machine, and which served no purpose except to block most of the wind that blew through the yard on that blazing summer day. Penn's head was already pounding from the dig, so he decided it would be best not to interact with Huggins. He kept his face down, hot but somehow still not sunburnt. Huggins and his goons were sitting on the couch, holding beers in their greasy hands.

They sat watching his expression, jeering at him. Not getting the outburst they hoped would entertain them and get him fired from their territory annoyed them greatly.

Kit Bander, Huggins' right hand man and loyal as he was retarded, stood up. 

"Hey, doofus! Huggins is talking to you, didn't you hear?" He yelled, glancing at Huggins for approval. The latter nodded as if endorsing a child's play mates. 

Penn kept his head down, drowning them out as best he could. He knew what they were up to. He was an outsider working on their turf, even though no sane person would want to defend this dump of a train yard. But he really fucking needed this job. Without Dad… It was a hellish situation.

"Leave it boys,” Huggins sneered. “He’s probably still thinking about how much cock he had to suck last night to pay off his monthly mortgage.” The goons chuckled. _Oh the things I’d do to them…_ Penn thought and shook his head. Control was the most important thing. He hadn’t felt The Urge in so long - and he planned to keep it that way.

He made his coffee (cold, God forbid the break room had any working electricity) as the others taunted him and bantered among themselves. Huggins was getting agitated the more Penn ignored him. _The douchebag’s dick is probably so small it would fit in a tube of lipstick_. Penn smiled to himself. They didn’t know shit about his true form… and what he could do if he wanted. 

The styrofoam cup barely fit a shot of coffee. Maybe that was a good thing; the coffee tasted like shit anyways, especially after Penn had been working since 6am and the ashy air had been absorbed into his dry taste buds so that each breath felt like he was chain smoking a pack of cigarettes. He grabbed the cup and turned around to leave, hoping he’d find a nice quiet place to sit by himself for the remaining fifteen minutes of his break before his next shift started. 

As he approached the couch, still avoiding contact, Huggins lost it. He stood up, invading Penn’s personal space. Penn hissed, startled. A little bit of coffee spilt and wet the dirty skin on his wrist.

“Our boy here thinks he’s too good for the rest of us, fellas,” Huggins’ spittle landed on Penn’s top lip. _That wasn’t a good idea._ The goons were all grinning, watching the show play out. “You thought you could just grab yourself a cup of coffee, have a nice break, yeah?” His tone softened, condescending. Penn didn’t respond, his mind still on that now cold little spot where the spittle had landed. “You walk in here like your daddy owns the place, hey? Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot, your daddy’s dead, isn’t he?” The others laughed, as though this was the funniest thing they’ve heard all week. 

Huggins stepped closed. Penn still kept his eyes down, angering the other even more. “Well, how about that. I got an idea. How about… How about I be your new daddy?” Huggins looked back at his goons, as if he had just been enlightened by a grandiose idea. He turned back to Penn. “Yeah, we’ll adopt you. You can go to school, make some friends, doesn’t that sound nice?” No response. “Hmm. Well, coffee ain’t no drink fit for a kid.” He knocked the coffee out of Penn’s hand. _Here we go._ “Look at your new daddy boy! Or do I have to make you suck my cock too?”

 _Now he’s just asking for it._ Penn looked up. His eyes met Huggins’ and he saw a quick flicker of fear flashed through his own reflection. Penn’s lips curved up into a smile. 

With a roar, Huggins drew his arm back for a punch. As if seeing it in slow-motion, Penn shoved the dirty asshole back. The fist missed his face and hit his shoulder as Huggins lost his balance. _Fuck, that’ll sting later._ But he felt nothing in the moment. The others stared, shocked. 

Huggins fell on his ass and screamed, “You’re going to hell, you lil’ bitch!” Before he had a chance to get up, Penn crouched down on top of him. He saw that fear again. _You want to have some actual fun, huh?_

Still smiling, he stared directly into Huggins’ eyes. A faint whirring noise filled the air, like some sort of breathing, writhing electricity was being generated around the two. He felt the inside of his nose becoming wet as the nosebleed began. In the corner of his eye, Penn saw the rusty metal corner of the coffee table poking out, just a foot away from Huggins’ balding head. 

Calmy, quietly, Penn said, “Lean your head over. See the corner of the table? Hit your head on it. I want to see blood.” 

The room stood still. No one breathed. Penn’s anticipation only grew as Huggins slowly looked over to his left. His eyes locked on the table. The fear was now all over his face as he realized, for the first time in his life, he was not in control of his own body. 

_Three_

_Two_

_One_

Huggins leaned forward, drew his head back and whipped it forward. His forehead collided with the table with a muted _thud._ Penn looked upon this action in complete satisfaction. _How’s it feel to get what you deserve, motherfucker?_ Huggins began to bleed. Bad. Deep red blood gushed over his eyebrows, then overflowed and drowned his eyes. It flowed down the sides of his face and his nose in viscous streaks, dripping down his chin onto his uniform. 

Penn brought his hand up and traced his fingers over the wound. They were stained red instantly. _Beautiful, fresh, blood._ His erection stirred in his pants as he licked his fingers, one by one. The smell of iron was overpowering. _Not here._

He got up, looking back at the still frame of Huggins’ goons on the couch, their beers still clutched tightly in their hands but largely forgotten. Their mouths hung open, still unbelieving that they had just witnessed their leader give himself a giant welt and a concussion after just being _told_ to do so _._

Penn’s rational (father’s) mind finally began to catch up to what had happened. _That was really fucking stupid. Shit._

“Get the fuck out of here! He hit his head. It was an accident. And anyone who thinks otherwise will have an accident of their own. Understood?” He didn’t bother controlling them; their fears did that for him. They scrambled out of the break room, some still in shock, some looking for help. 

Sighing, Penn looked over at Huggins. The guy’s eyes were open, glazed over with his own blood. His shoulders were slumped and he was still sitting on his ass. _Definitely concussion. Won’t be seeing you around for a while._

Penn wiped the blood of his face with the bottom of his shirt, exposing his toned stomach to the hot air. He then poured himself another coffee, mindful of the bloody corner that Huggins had such an intimate moment with, and left the room before anyone with a rational mind had a chance to see him in there. 

_________

The door creaked open and Penn stepped in, locking it behind him. _Home sweet home._ He got the medical kit from the entry hallway cabinet to his left; he found it useful to keep it easily accessible. There was nothing he could do with a bruise except take two Tylenols - _good thing there's just the two, I'm in the mood to overdose -_ and grab something to eat. He walked through the dingy hall towards the kitchen. Cobwebs hung above him on the cracked ceiling but he would start to care the moment he had the time to clean. 

There was nothing attractive in the fridge. _Fuck, forgot to go get groceries._ A ketchup bottle and a leftover slice of store-made pizza were all the options that greeted and waved to his hungry stomach. Penn growled in annoyance and shut the fridge. He was sure there was some pork in the freezer downstairs, but he was worried he wouldn’t be able to make it back up the stairs and his body would only be found years later when the few neighbours he had would start to notice the rotting stench. Instead he reached into the cupboard over the stove, grabbed the warm bottle of piss-yellow Jagermeister and swallowed several large gulps. The liquid stung his throat, but it felt good. _They say you shouldn’t mix alcohol with pain meds. Fuck my liver, I guess._ Penn put the bottle back, his eyes swimming with tears from the Jagermeister.

His head pounded as he collapsed on the lonely couch in the living room. It was such a long fucking day, not even entirely owing to the two eight-hour shifts he had to work. There was that entire incident with Huggins in the afternoon. Good thing no one bothered him about it. He was sure it would come back to bite him in the ass when he would least expect it, but that wasn’t his concern for the present. _Why is it so fucking hot today?_ The air conditioner had broken down at the start of the summer - fanfuckingtastic timing - and he was forced to rot in the same heat that tortured him at work. It was surprising that The Urge hadn’t come back at all; it was usually fueled by heat. His migraines certainly were. 

_Then there was that girl._ She had come out of nowhere at the end of the day, when the sun had all but completed its daily setting. He had never seen her, though Derry was a fairly small town by Maine standards. He had looked up, barely standing straight from the day’s exhaustion, and seen her looking back at him with an expression of… curiosity? wonder? It was hard to read her. This pissed him off. A lot. He thought it must have been the way that her lukewarm brown eyes examined him. _It made you feel vulnerable. Something about her. Something was… off._

He needed control.

So he decided he had enough energy for just one more magic trick. The air crackled with electricity as he froze her on the spot, forcing her to watch

(She seemed to already be watching him watching him undressing him studying him _shut the fuck up_ )

as he played the illusion out, making blood flow from his mouth. It was one of his favourite moves. Usually sent the unsuspecting passersby running and screaming; he loved that taste of fear. And then they would wonder what had scared them so much… they always seemed to forget after a little. That was fortunate for him, or he’d have to control a lot of people to be able to stay in this shithole called Derry. 

He had felt her fear, felt it on his tongue like candied apple. Sweet, sweet fear. But what she did surprised him. She didn’t run. She didn’t scream. Not like the others. _What the fuck was she thinking?_

Instead, he had heard her ask him if he was... “okay”? 

_What the fuck? What the FUCK was wrong with her? Why did she... Why did she not just fucking run?!_

His mind was racing. Was it possible that she didn’t see what he wanted her to see - that she saw something else? _No, it can’t. She’s human. I tasted her fear._ Maybe... his powers were weakening. _No._ Maybe he was losing himself. _NO._ Penn’s energy was drained much more than it should have been after a simple trick like that. He noticed that he was breathing heavily, but that must have just been from the walk home. _Yes. I’m fucking tired. That’s all that it was. That stupid girl must have not seen clearly from so far away, she probably just saw how dirty and sweaty I was. Yes. That’s why she asked_ that. _And I’m tired because it’s been a long, LONG, day. There’s a logical explanation for everything._

Penn groaned. His head and shoulder were still aching, even though the pills should have done their magic by now. The heat was almost unbearable. It surrounded him in thick murky waves, threatening to block out spots of his vision. He briefly remembered that he worked the morning shift again tomorrow; the alarm clock should be loud enough to wake him up if he fell asleep here. And he wanted to. The couch enveloped him, like the warm air around him. Everything was so hot, like a blanket he couldn’t wriggle out of. And he felt himself drifting away… farther… farther… beautiful deep chestnut brown… farther…

________

BRRRIIIIIIIINGGG

Penn’s head snapped up. A loud crack echoed off the mucky drywall of the room and he groaned, lifting a hand to rub his sore neck. He had flipped over onto his back sometime during the night and had slept with his head hanging over the edge of the couch. Looking over at the time on the kitchen stove, he realized it was still the middle of the night: 2:56am. His headache had receded ( _thank God_ ) but the pounding in his head hadn’t. He could feel the blood pulsing and slowly receding back into the rest of his body out of the arteries and veins in his head.

BRRRIIIIIIIINGGG

 _FUCKING SHUT UP._ His throat rumbled, sore and dry after the Jagermeister. Penn staggered to his feet, reaching into the back pocket of his jeans for the source of the ringing. Almost immediately, he fell back onto the couch with such force it sent small clouds of dust up into the air around him. 

The phone screen read: **Peter Rumancek** . _What does that fucker need so bad that he thought he should wake me up?_ He answered the call.

“The fuck do you want, Rumancek?” Penn snarled.

“Heey, brrrrother. Good to hear... mmm your voice!” The voice in the speaker cheerfully replied. Penn closed his eyes, rubbing his temples. 

Careful to keep his cool - Peter was really testing his patience this time - Penn tried again, “Peter. Do you have any idea what time it is? Why’d you wake me?”

“Yeahhhh mm’babbbby it’s partytime!” Peter screeched. Penn smirked. The bastard was high. “Look… hummm Penn, not to take up, y’know, too much of your… y’know, precious time. There’s this - huh? What’d you say mmm’sweetheart? Penn, wait hold on -” Penn could hear muffled voices, giggling, on the other line. Peter’s and some girl’s voice, but he wasn’t too sure. Loud music blasted in the background. Penn waited, his temper boiling in the pit of his stomach. The gypsy could really be a pain in his ass.

He was about to hang up when Peter came back, “Sorry about that, mmm’brother... this bitch’s ass was in the air and you know me hAHa.. I just couldn’t resist mmmmyself.” _Definitely high_. “Look - hmmph where was, y’know, I?”

“I think you got to about the same place.”

“You’re funnnnny. Isn’t he funny mmm’darling? He’s mmmmy best... friend, that he is,” Peter broke out into laughter. 

“Fucking get on it already!” Penn snapped.

“Oh, mmmy bad. This chick here, she says there’s sommme party. For us, brother!”

“The fuck you on about?” This made Peter giggle again.

“Weeell - I don’t think it’s for… mmm us exactly. High schoolers. Seniorrrrs,” Peter rolled the R, attempting to sound Spanish. 

“And you woke me up at 3 am to tell me this?” Penn’s patience was now wearing paper thin. Peter was gonna get a hell of a beating for this when he was sober. 

“Is it 3 am already? Oh baby, the night is mmm young,” Peter was talking to the girl with him. Penn hoped he was having the time of his life. He was definitely going to kill Peter this time. “Brother-er… you go back to your PJ’S then - and your... bedtime. Us big mm’kids are gonna have some fun. But Penn?”

“Hmm?” He was gonna hang up in ten seconds. 

“You better mmm’fucking come to that party. I’ll text you... Deets. It’ll be LIT, yeah?”

“Goodbye Peter.” _Beep_ as the call ended. 

Going back to sleep was a little pointless now. Penn was wide awake, roused by the powerful bass in the music he heard from Peter’s side. _Well, fuck._

There were still a few hours before he had to leave for work. Now that his mind was clearer, his own incredible stench finally penetrated through his nose and into his brain. _Disgusting._ Sixteen hours working on a summer day in the dusty asshole of the devil himself will do that to a guy.

He got up once more to take a shower. The floorboards creaked beneath his bare feet as they left practically visible footprints in the thick layer of dust on the floor. He really needed to fucking clean the place. Penn climbed the stairs in darkness, reaching for and finding the handrail on instinct; the lightbulb here had gone out long ago, and what was he gonna do? Call the fucking electrician?

At the top, he walked to the end of the hall, the paint coming off the walls in large sheets, to the bathroom. This was probably the dirtiest place of the house. The ceramic toilet cowered in the corner. The sink was overflowing with draining water. Spiders scurried along their private nightly business on the fungi-covered ceiling. Glancing around distastefully, he shut the door and peeled the clothing off of his skin.

For a moment, he caught himself in the cloudy mirror above the sink. 

His skin was pale and covered in ash. Pale skin and blood red lips. The high cheekbones that cut through the sides of his face looked sharp, his cheeks sunken in. There were deep dark bags under his eyes. A worse sight lay below his collarbone. The bruise on his shoulder was not a lonely mark; blue and black marked his skin at every corner, intersection, and curve. He was in good shape - sleek muscles rippling beneath the dirty skin - albeit a bit skinny. Nothing he could do about that; _no money no problemo._

Staring into his own eyes gave Penn the chills. He had tried the whole self-controlling act years ago, but the results weren’t too good. His father would disapprove. 

He remembered how his father would look directly into his eyes, dark blue into electric blue, frowning. _Son, you must learn to control yourself. You are your own greatest enemy,_ he used to say. Then he’d ruffle Penn’s firey hair and leave. The same hair on the same head that was looking back at him in the mirror today. _Dad must have hated looking into this face. And now the fucker’s gone._

Penn flinched at the thought and stepped into the bathtub, turning the shower on. The water was chilling and filled with black flecks of rust, but he didn’t mind. Another privilege of living wealthy. Penn just kept his eyes and mouth closed as he quickly washed all the grime off his body. A tremble went through his legs as his hand slid over his member. _It’s been so long._ He hasn’t been inside a girl in ages, and the day-to-day exhaustion left him unexcited and unwilling. _Not today. Just get some more sleep._

He kept cleaning himself, rubbing at the coal stuck to his arms and shoulders, careful around the newly forming bruise, credits to Huggins. 

Strangely, he found his mind wandering back to what Peter had said. _A party? For seniors, hey? Could be fun, if bossman gave me a fucking break and paid me more than his mother gets for slutting it out in the back alleys of this wonderful town._ The soapy water ran almost black over his body. _Wonder if that girl would be…_

Blood began to rush into his groin. He cursed himself, pissed off for it disobeying his direct decision to sleep it off. 

“Fucking pathetic,” he muttered under his breath as he began scrubbing his hair. His dick persisted, waking up. 

_All that fucking bitch. Fucking crazy for not running away. I’ll show her for doing this to me. For… for pretending to care about me. I’ll show her what being scared is_ really _like._

Penn quickly turned off the tap, stepped out of the tub and dried himself off, still ignoring his desires. The late night exhaustion was creeping back as his eyelids grew heavier. 

Clean, or clean enough, he stomped out of the bathroom into his room. Four grey walls guarded a wooden cabinet with his shit and a single bed on rusty springs. The alarm clock would ring in a little less than two hours. Penn groaned and collapsed on the bed, caring for little else but to escape back into sleep for the little time he had. The warm air prickled at his cold skin from the shower. He wouldn’t need blankets to sleep tonight; it was going to be hot enough. Better to fall asleep before it really started to get to him. Already, the earliest hints of dawn were fighting through the darkness of the night.

Penn felt that familiar feeling of drifting off and welcomed it gratefully. _That’s all folks,_ was his last coherent thought. Right before slipping over the edge, his subconscious let him enjoy the thought of delicious swirling chestnut and chocolate brown.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm thinking of blending It and Hemlock Grove a little more, so, hopefully, some more familiar characters will pop up soon enough. In the meantime, enjoy

**Author's Note:**

> Okay I haven't -quite- figured out where this is gonna go, but stick around for the ride and let's see what happens. Enjoy!


End file.
